Cost of going to court
Geplaatst: 04 jul 2023, 16:42
Hello fathers,
I do sincerely apologize that my Dutch is not good enough to write but I can understand better.
I have been in a conflict with my Ex since my divorce 7 years back and have had an incredibly difficult time since then.
During this period, I have been trying to review the Parental plan that was rushed through during the divorce (as stated in the plan) since it is not working for me, ex refused.
Ex has selectively refused to honor part of the agreement that she doesn’t like such as the part that grants me the chance to exchange days with her for business trips.
Ex missed exchange of children after summer vacation and only turned up 3 days later, which lead to cancellation of my holiday with new partner.
Ex has prevented access to children on several occasions, has called the police on me several times with crazy accusations. On several case, the police dismissed these allegations because I could clearly show audio/video evidence, still she was able to take it to the appeal court to force the police to investigate, which she lost.
Ex told lies about me to friends and school, which led school refused to cooperate/share children information until I threaten to take formal action.
The outcome is that I am exhausted, drained, with a smaller ecosystem , and very disappointed that a lie can be allowed to carry on even when there are clear evidences that shows the opposite ( in this case her own words against her)!
The outcome of all this is:
• My relationship with my teenage child has forever changed and cannot be reversed
• The trauma of how i have been treated has led to mental issues including long term insomnia that is here to stay
• I have lost 3 jobs and have change career (I turned down a high level position in a major company because of my current situation) and now work remotely
• Third party organization such as ViliegThuis, OudeKindTeam, and the designated Parallel Parenting coaches assigned seem to be all doing her wishes and have drafted a new parental plan that only takes her wishes into consideration and have refused to include mine.
My question after this long introduction is, I want to take this matter to court and want to know if any of you have the experience of:
• Changing children domicile: Ex never shares information send to her house concerning the children
• Change in the schedule concerning when the children are with either parent: I have fixed days that is not practical for travel and have literally begged her if we can make it flexible
• Range or estimated cost of going to court: does the losing side pays the winner’s cost?
As a co-parent, I know the court is a landmine for fathers, and as a pacifist, really see this as a last route, but I want to take charge of my own life and don’t think it is fair that I should have a lesser life than I used to have because I am divorced..
Any help (even in Dutch) is greatly appreciated.
I do sincerely apologize that my Dutch is not good enough to write but I can understand better.
I have been in a conflict with my Ex since my divorce 7 years back and have had an incredibly difficult time since then.
During this period, I have been trying to review the Parental plan that was rushed through during the divorce (as stated in the plan) since it is not working for me, ex refused.
Ex has selectively refused to honor part of the agreement that she doesn’t like such as the part that grants me the chance to exchange days with her for business trips.
Ex missed exchange of children after summer vacation and only turned up 3 days later, which lead to cancellation of my holiday with new partner.
Ex has prevented access to children on several occasions, has called the police on me several times with crazy accusations. On several case, the police dismissed these allegations because I could clearly show audio/video evidence, still she was able to take it to the appeal court to force the police to investigate, which she lost.
Ex told lies about me to friends and school, which led school refused to cooperate/share children information until I threaten to take formal action.
The outcome is that I am exhausted, drained, with a smaller ecosystem , and very disappointed that a lie can be allowed to carry on even when there are clear evidences that shows the opposite ( in this case her own words against her)!
The outcome of all this is:
• My relationship with my teenage child has forever changed and cannot be reversed
• The trauma of how i have been treated has led to mental issues including long term insomnia that is here to stay
• I have lost 3 jobs and have change career (I turned down a high level position in a major company because of my current situation) and now work remotely
• Third party organization such as ViliegThuis, OudeKindTeam, and the designated Parallel Parenting coaches assigned seem to be all doing her wishes and have drafted a new parental plan that only takes her wishes into consideration and have refused to include mine.
My question after this long introduction is, I want to take this matter to court and want to know if any of you have the experience of:
• Changing children domicile: Ex never shares information send to her house concerning the children
• Change in the schedule concerning when the children are with either parent: I have fixed days that is not practical for travel and have literally begged her if we can make it flexible
• Range or estimated cost of going to court: does the losing side pays the winner’s cost?
As a co-parent, I know the court is a landmine for fathers, and as a pacifist, really see this as a last route, but I want to take charge of my own life and don’t think it is fair that I should have a lesser life than I used to have because I am divorced..
Any help (even in Dutch) is greatly appreciated.